If your life was an epic fantasy movie...

There are some people who live in a dream world, and there are some who face reality; and then there are those who turn one into the other.

-Douglas Everett

The first time I saw Lord of the Rings, I was filled with a deep sense of loss. I remember saying to the person I saw the movie with that I probably should never watch really good fantasy movies because I always came out of the theater feeling deeply and terribly disappointed with my real life.

The second time I saw the the movies was several years later, and as I was watching it, something Gandalf said to Frodo really leapt out at me. Here's the quote:

All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us.

And I started thinking... so what have I been doing with the time that is given to me? And can I actually change what I have been doing with my time?

That line of thought came along with that older familiar thought that I really wished my life was more like an epic fantasy movie and less the dull unremarkable story it actually is. And I realized that if it really was up to me to do what I willed with the time I had - that maybe, just maybe, I could make the decision to live my life AS IF it was an epic fantasy movie. Which is, of course, easier said than done by a long shot!

And that was when this whole Lord of the Rings, "who was I and who would I want to be," was born. I put myself into the movie, and realized that for the last couple of years, I had been playing the part of Denethor. (If you haven't seen the movie, or it's been a while, he's the crazy depressed steward of Gondor who was always freaking out about how there was no hope, no one would help, his son was dead, and he might as well set himself on fire - all the while ignoring the fact that there really was at least some small hope, a number of people who were willing to help, and a younger son who was alive.) Not a very attractive person, and not someone I would wish to be in the world.

So, ever since then, I have set about to try and change my reality and create something bigger, better, more interesting, more fun, more exciting -- a larger than ordinary life. I don't know if I am succeeding, but this year I have progressed as far as Fanghorn forest, having spent a fair amount of 2009 as an Ent. What exactly does that mean? Well, it means I've spent way too much time talking endlessly about maybe doing something and not much time at all actually doing it. It means a lot of bla bla bla, and a fair amount of angst over what was lost so long ago that I don't even remember what it looks like anymore. It means minding my own business and trying not to get involved in anything that doesn't directly concern me.

"Don't be hasty." That's been my motto this year, and it would be a good motto except that it isn't Treebeard who I want to be in this world. In my heart, I'm not an Ent!

So here's the question for today. If your life was an epic fantasy movie - and it doesn't matter which epic fantasy you choose, which character could you honestly say you've been playing for the past year? And is that character someone you WANT to be in that world? Tomorrow we'll be talking about who we DO want to be, but for today, let's just think about who we have been up until now.
I'd love it if you guys would post your preferred movies, because I'll rent the ones you love if I can and then we can compare notes. If your epic fantasy adventure is a romance, or historical, or even a murder mystery, it doesn't matter. Pick a movie (or a book) you would dearly love to be "in" and tell us about it.